Sunday, December 26, 2010

Glad tidings

Last year I decided to write a holiday letter on the blog. I had fun doing it, so I am doing it again, only different. Here are excerpts from my journal. Enjoy my chaos!
Hooray my new journal! I bought this journal in hopes that I would be on a cruise ship in Hawaii. But alas, I start this journal in my parents basement...Haiti was struck by a huge earthquake 1/12/10. The death count is up to 50k..Awesome news about Esther: she is probably delivering at a birthing suite rather than the hospital. I am selfishly delighted. I have never helped with a birth at a birthing suite. I feel it is more appropriate for them anyway...-I know one thing for certain, I have been blessed with friends-GOOD friends. I wish to be a better friend...I went (alone) to see Avatar. Oh my! I absolutely loved it... Last night, I fell upon a new discovery, Melissa is logged on to Netflix on mom's computer. What does this mean? It means that I watched Motorcycle Diaries last night.
Aubrey and I went up to the Sundance Film Festival we had the perfect day. I didn't go up to see any films, I went up to go to cafe music.... Last Sunday 1.24.10, Esther had her baby, Eve Satareh Vasefi. I am not sure on the middle name spelling, but it means Esther in Farsi. I was there for the birth. It was the most beautiful and fantastic experience...I am reading a book called Ask and It is Given by Ester and Jerry Hicks. It's about the law of attraction- mostly about the law of allowing. It is hard to allow blessings and goodness into my life....I had a small conflict whether or not to go to the V-day party. I opted out because I was tired after work, didn't wear deodorant, and my hair looked greasy. I regretted not going because I want to be more social.
This past weekend, Feb. 27 thru today I have been traveling...Oak Creek canyon takes you down the mountainside. Then comes the beautiful city of Sedona. I was in awe. The homes, the vortexes, the red rock, the forests, and the colors. I saw all the colors and knew I had entered a special place...It was nearly dark the lighting and temperature were perfect. We went into the canyon and spent time listening to silence and reminding ourselves that we are peace. It had recently rained and the air was crisp and clean. We loved being alone together and with ourselves. Sometimes the best therapy is a nature walk.
Here I am sitting naked in my parent's basement doing laundry at 11:30 p.m., four days until my 25th birthday...My birthday celebrations this week have been unreal. Palm reader, massages, new hair, night on the town with Heather, and family celebrations on Sunday...Wed was the full moon. I was anticipating the birth with the moon in mind...Her breathe slowed and her face changed. The world started spinning again and the next push Violet was here!
Here I am in San Antonio, TX. I thought I would never make it... Becky is my oldest friend. We know each other so well...Acupressure points to induce labor: ...How to put a woman into full labor: ...We extended, or rather bought a new plane ticket home. I am now leaving on June 8th.... Becky finally had Hazel. She was born at 11:56 a.m. on the 28th after 85 hours of ACTIVE HARD labor.The nurses were generally nice. Kate by far was our favorite. There was an untouchable gentleness about her...We had to be each other's strength. We can all remember times when we lost it.
I am home now and back into my old familiar routine. Since being home, I want to cry at least twice everyday...I got some new music from Ashley today: Jack Johnson's new album and Florence and the Machine. There's nothing like new music to get me jazzed. I also made my first purchase from I bought Sophie Uliano's newest book.
Something cool happened yesterday. I was working on Scott and he asked me to read his energy. So I turned on the Reiki... I believe I am blessed with the gift of healing-at least to some degree....
I am starting to feel doubt creep into my soul. Jesus and God help me through. Where did the magic go?....
It's amazing how moods can change. I am in a really good spot in my life...Baby James is here! It is amazing to know the nature of a baby when he/she arrives. We all knew James was happy, calm, lovable, and beautiful.
I drove the Nebo loop today- which I've never done before. I did it for a few reasons: to experience the weather shift and to finish the Birth of Venus (book on cd). To me, it was a book about revolutions and liberations and the consequences thereafter. I was totally drawn to it. I've been experiencing my own revolutions...Recently my eyes are changing. I see control, fear, and additional teachings.
I went to Cheryl's house today. I was very surprised, grateful, and saddened by my visit. She did something very unique, she started the session with a prayer. The prayer was unlike any prayer I have ever heard, very sincere and personal...I miss having grandparents. I wish GJ were here. She would make it feel better.
I had another session with Cheryl today. I am certainly glad that I went to see her. I am going to give myself credit. I am brave. It is scary to go to someone and find out your past and sort through the details.
The challenge of life is overcoming your human nature. God judges us according to who we are and not what we do. Understanding this distinction brings me to another realization: Who you are are vs what you do: For example, a man can steal a penny and another man 10k. It's not the amount that matters to God, both men stole. What is in their hearts to make them steal?
I massaged a man last Saturday and he read my character. He said: 'You are kind, compassionate, and you love what you do because you love helping people. Many people may not view you as smart, but you are very smart and you are also wise which is an unusual combination. You are very forgiving- except right now there is someone in your life who you want to ring their neck. You have many friends who love you. You are a good listener. The best compliment is for someone to call you a lady.' That is all I remember. He was eloquent in speech. I misjudged him at first. I guess everyone taps into the pool of consciousness...I went outside around 2 a.m. and it was silent except for the herd of deer across the street...The wind was strong today-it's blowing in something big...Huge snowstorm. I went out around 12 a.m. to see the silence that a good snow cover brings. I made snow angels, and a heart on the side yard. I was 5 again.

Friday, December 24, 2010

Christmas Blues

I was having a big case of the Christmas blues because my parent's didn't have any decorations up this year. We had our Christmas party on Sunday and my mom borrowed a little tiny tree from her work for the party. It isn't the same when you don't have any of your own decor, or rather any decor up. My mom's new slogan this year has been, "It's still Christmas even if the tree isn't up." Bah hum bog! I took matters into my own hands. I got a real tree, thank you Ashley, and had it delivered last night. My parent's were busy watching Psych on the computer so they didn't see the deliverey. Another factor on my side is my parent's bed time. They go to bed before 9 pm. They were fast asleep by 10 pm and I was setting up a real Christmas tree all by myself, which was really fun because I got to choose all of the ornaments and such. My mom was smelling the pine in her dreams and couldn't believe her eyes when she awoke to a Christmas tree. Lots of questions were entering her mind: when!?, how!?, what!? My blues are gone and I don't know if it's because I got a tree or because I surprised mom and dad, but I am certainly happy about it. I take the saying 'if there is a will there is a way' very literally. Merry Christmas!

Monday, December 13, 2010

I won an ipod touch. Thank you Bank of the West. I am still figuring out how to use it . If I could say something without judgement from anyone, I really wish it had a camera, Oh well. I have been manifesting an ipod for some time now. Who knew I would get a brand new one, let alone a sleek ipod touch.

I am still behind in getting into all things merry and Christmas. I haven't stepped into a shopping center all month. Time is running short, but that is how I roll with almost everything- last minute. Anyway, I don't really believe in participating in the consumerism of the holiday. Maybe one day when I have to be Santa I will be different.

I had a birth last week. It was beautiful. More details to come.

I got bangs. Wahoo. They are really fun. I have noticed something unpleasant though, my forehead breaks out now. The breakage outage is mostly around my hair line which is better than mid-forehead, but still unsettling. Pics soon.

Lastly and perhaps most exciting, both of my sisters are bringing girls into the world Spring 2011. Congratulations to Shelley (baby number 1) and Heather (baby number 4). Joy is errupting from every vessel of my body.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

Clean air please

It can seem insignificant to reduce, reuse, and recycle- ESPECIALLY because Utah makes it so diffucult and non-friendly. However, maybe if everyone rallied together and did just one thing we could go from red alert to yellow alert for the next 6 months. I kind of want to be able to breathe and the air outside is discusting. Damien Rice jokes about bottled air but I don't think it's too far off.

Many people, including my dear parents, think that environmental issues such as global warming is conspiracy and when debating it turns into an 'it's God's plan' argument. In response, God via Jesus created this world with tlc. Therefore, do whatever you want to it? No, consider the lilies of the field. That field is on it's it way to being a toxic waste facility. 

p.s. Christmas is the time of ultimate consumption. Please, for the sake of everyone, be responsible for your footprint.

p.p.s I am as damned as anyone. I don't write this post from a place of superiority, I write this post from a valley with trapped toxic air :)

Sunday, November 21, 2010

Attention Santa

Dear Santa,

Thank you for being jolly, wearing red, and encouraging Buddy go to New York to find his dad. Here is this year's wish list.
-Counter top bathroom vanity filter unit from
-Aria diffuser from Young Living
-Products from Young Living: Core Supplements, Animal Scents shampoo, Feelings Kit, Dreamcatcher, Awaken, and Sacred Frankincense.
-An Alaskan Husky puppy with both eyes blue
-A PC laptop
-Sonic Care electric toothbrush
-Sunset Bronzer from Mineral Essence
Thanks SC.


Monday, November 8, 2010

Inner Child

Here I am having a blast in the leaves on Sunday. Thank you leaves because I will soon resent you when I am hauling you away with my dad. 

p.s. leaves provide a lot of warmth. maybe that's how mary ingles survived...

Monday, October 25, 2010

"Ask and ye shall receive" - Jesus

Madsen Cycles: Can I be the winner?

Madsen Cycles Cargo Bikes

Click on the picture so I can win!!! :)

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Autumn Ecstasy

This is my favorite time of year for many reasons. Along with the beauty, comes excitement and bounty.

I have eaten in season and that brings me great satisfaction.

My heart has been absorbing a lot information which has got my mind stirring. I have been taking classes, attending meditations, and getting a lot of body/spirit/emotional work done on myself.

I have been unusually sentimental and sappy. I am remembering every detail so that I can write it down for my brother who is not able to enjoy autumn this year. My cursive is getting faster and less legible. There is something so beautiful about a hand written letter. It is my joy to write- the physical movement of ink on paper and  the creative process.

I discovered a new beautiful place, Pole canyon. Wow! I can't think of a more luscious escape this time of year. The colors are brilliant and the landscape is open so the whole canyon is exposed.

The music scene is hot. Fall is always my new music season. I have been loving Josh Ritter, Ray Lamontagne and the Pariah Dogs, Wilco, and Ben Kweller. Also, I just finished Inkheart on cd. I LOVED the narrator. I commute for about an hour everyday so I can get through books and music pretty swiftly.

As far as books are concerned, I discovered the children's non-fiction section at the library. This has brought me much grief because I can't read as fast as I want to. Also, I am reading Gone with the Wind. I am pacing myself with that monster. Also, because I am reading Gone with the Wind, I have a heated sensation to learn more about the civil war and civil rights. I don't like war history, but GWTW has romanced the civil war in a huge way and I firmly believe that civil rights is an ongoing issue today.

I am hopelessly enjoying the last of the green before the white and never-ending brown winter. I am determined to like winter this year. Here is my plan: buy good boots so my feet don't cold and wet, participate in a winter activity, and spend more time outside in the sun hours. I would love to include an Alaskan Husky in my plan, but my parents won't go for it.

Because I feel bountiful, I am offering a new treatment for $20 It is a compilation of light massage, acupressure, and emotional release. I want to get more familiar with it before I charge full price. If your heart has been as open as mine this season, please come and enjoy!

Also, for everyone who is sick, (it seems like everyone) come in (or I can come to you) and get a raindrop technique or lymphatic work. Feeling ill is awful. Health and wellness is an option even during "flu season." I am not as concerned about money as I am about the people I love being well. We can always work out a deal. I am wheeler and a dealer :)

Thursday, September 30, 2010

Dream State

All I know, is that I am sick of opening my blog and seeing the "bookworm" post. I learned a cool piece of information that I want to pass on about sleep.

When we go to sleep, we are connecting to our spirits. We are remembering our mission in life, getting answers to prayers, and communicating with....whoever you communicate with. Usually, almost always, right before we wake up, we have these outlandish dreams about five headed monsters or totally bizarre circumstances. That way, when we wake up we only remember the weird dream because it blocks out all of our messages and communications that help us in this life. However, there is a way to retain the information you want instead of the chaos. Before you sleep, offer a prayer to remove all unclean things from your sleep state. The first night I did this, I learned a really cool piece of information that I use almost daily.

Try it! This simple act could change things for you. Really, it's the simple things that change and impact our lives. Happy sleeping!

Monday, August 23, 2010

Book Worm

I finished The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo by Stiegg Larsson. I love a good mystery and by about page 50 I was hooked. Until page 50, I was considering returning it to the library. Here is an honest review offered by a person who rarely reads mystery novels: I thought the author was really tricky. I liked his angles and his layout of the story. I did get a bit nervous when some of the trails weren't uncovered, but it's a series and I didn't know that going in. The book is probably meant to be read by adults- as there is some graphic descriptions. In the end, I am not dying to read the next book, The Girl who Played with Fire, but it's on my to-read list, for sure.

As for books I am dying to read the sequel, I am on the waiting for Catching Fire by Suzanne Collins and getting really impatient! Hunger Games was probably one of the better books I have ever read. I remember about a year ago when my mom was raving about the series and I sort of dismissed her drawn out passionate description of the books. That is because, my mom also recommends books like Tennis Shoes Among the Nephites. Anyway, Hunger Games had me thinking for days. I couldn't absorb it quickly enough.

Also on my list of sequels, is Committed by Elizabeth Gilbert. I loved Eat, Pray, Love- which was not her first book, but her first big success. I forgot how much I liked her style of writing until I went to the movie, twice. She is fun, witty, and everything connects. For those of you who like her, check out her Ted Talk.

I feel bad for those who don't enjoy a good novel. To really enjoy reading there has to be a shift. It's like you read the one book that changes your mind about reading. From that time forward you are willing to take a chance on another book because you remember you enjoy reading. Reading is good for my soul. It is an escape as well as a grounding experience. For those non-readers, thanks for reading this post about reading!

Thursday, August 5, 2010

Oh My Glod!

The countdown begins!

August 28, 2010, at the Lincoln Memorial site, Glenn Beck (aka Glod) has a message to save America!

Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Sweet Baby James

April's pregnancy flew by so fast. I hardly prepped myself for this birth. About a week before baby James came, I talked with April about her wants, wishes, and fears. In preparation for this birth, she took a hypno-birthing class. She seemed pleased with the class and believed in the principles. I concluded a few things after our talk, she was flexible with her birth plan and not totally convinced that natural childbirth was a reality for her. Her energies were more focused on what to do with two children, because one way or another, she was going to have two children soon! I admire her wisdom and priorities. Inside with my thoughts, I wanted her to have a natural childbirth experience because I knew she wanted it!

 April opted to get started on pitocin to avoid going over and/or having an enormous baby. She started around 7 a.m. I got there around 9:30 a.m. Dialation was slow but contractions were coming steadily. When I walked into the room, I knew April was totally present. She was assertive, confident, and calm. I have always known April to be confident, but then and there, she was more. April asked questions and was responsible and engaged. The nurse was awesome to work with. She was very knowledgable and supportive of natural childbirth. I knew that no matter what happened, we had a winning team and April was in good hands.

For the first few hours we sat around. I rubbed her feet, we played cards (I lost everytime), and we talked. Also present, was Brett (husband), Mom, and sisters. There was a lot of support and good energy in the room. April led the way, the team was synergistic and open minded with every milestone.

Finally the decision came, should her waters be broken or remain in tact? It was decided to break them since she was on the highest dose of pitocin, and not opening as fast as expected. After her waters were released, labor started coming on strong. There was no turning back. The dosage of pitocin was immediatley halved and then halved again. Her body took over and knew exactly what to do.

With all of the pairs of hands, we were able to use counter pressure on every surge. Also, our hands were there to serve, comfort, and love April throughout the time in between surges. All too soon, it was time to push. She made it! Within a few moments of pushing, baby James flew out!

It is amazing to know the nature of a baby when he/she arrives. We all knew James was happy, calm, loveable, and beautiful. He hardly cried except when roughed up by the staff. Breastfeeding was established easily and almost immediately.

I was most touched when April's other son, Luke, came to meet baby James with Grandpa. I watched April as her heart grew. Sometimes, it seems like the heart isn't capable of more love and then it is. The love radiated beyond the walls of our hospital room. As I observed, I was reminded again of the powerful combination of family and love. Nothing can touch that.

Congratulations again to April, the woman, mother, and dear friend.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Beacon Bros

If you say 'beer can' with a British accent it sounds like you said 'beacon' with Jamaican accent. Okay, I think I have exhausted that enough. It still makes me laugh though, really really hard...

This is actually a post promoting The Beacon Brothers- as in Kevin our beloved friend who filmed Footloose in Utah. I have this co-worker who is slightly obsessed with them and I am forced to listen to their music.  I actually like it. They have a cool style. I am not too keen on most of the lyrics, but the harmony and music is pretty.

When you get an extra music minute, check them out or not.

Thursday, July 22, 2010

Monday, July 19, 2010

Summertime Camping

I went camping on Saturday with Melissa. We got my favorite spot! I was so pleased. Usually when I go camping, I tag along with an outdoorsy master. I don't lift a finger to help with fires, food, tents, and the like. Not to speak for Meliss, but she's the same--we just hang out and let the experts do all the work. However, this was totally different. We did it all!! It was all fine until the sun went down and we killed the last of the orange embers. It was pitch black. I brought some fine reading material with me. All three volumes-mind you! Needless to say, I was totally spooked. Suddenly all sounds were threats lurking outside of our tent. Luckily, I fell asleep at some point.  In the morning as we were enjoying breakfast and building another fire, we encountered upon a visitor. He was friendly. I was doing most of the talking until he asked this question: "Did you guys drop a litter over there?" My face fell as I was thinking about what he just asked. It could have meant two different things: Did I drop off a litter of kittens? or Did I go to the bathroom over there? The answer to both of these questions is "Yes, but not over there and none of your business!" Melissa, picking up on my loss for words, replied to his question with "No, we haven't dropped a lure. We didn't bring our poles. What types of fish are in the river?" Saved! and WTF!! I felt like an idiot. Oh well. Later, when I explained my inner monologue to Melissa, we were laughing and laughing and laughing.

Thursday, July 15, 2010

For those of you who aren't getting them on fun exotic vacations....

Summer is perfect to get a massage because your probably more active, your skin needs TLC from all the sun exposure, and rates are low! Take advantage! Hope to see you soon. I am pretty good :-) 

Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Health Mania

This last week I worked in the spa at the Young Living Convention. I went up early everyday (or stayed late) to participate in the convention. I learned so much! I am happy to be a distributor for a company committed to making organic, green, and quality products.

Meanwhile, back at home, I was receiving my Amazon purchases. I recently created an account and bought three books: The Gorgeously Green Diet & How to do it Gorgeously by Sophie Uliano, and The Green Smoothie Diet by Robyn Openshaw. I have started reading all three books already and am soaking in information faster than a bacteria filled kitchen sponge!

I am happy to share some information with those still reading:

-We are extremely deficient in hormones. We are swiftly collecting artificial hormones from produce, dairy products, and skin products- which is totally throwing off our bodies ability to maintain homeostasis. Some common problems affecting women who are hormone deficient: TMJ, depression, PMS, infertility, thyroid problems, and migraines. Basically everyone I know is suffering with one of these problems.

Young Living just released a new product called Progessence Plus Serum. This product is made from wild yams, vitamin E, frankincense, bergamont, and menthol from peppermint. Apply topically over your carotid artery. The product is around $45.

More information coming. I was totally overwhelmed thinking about all of the hormones I was ingesting.

On a happy unrelated note: I am thrilled to announce that I have completed the Fablehaven series. This included five teen fantasy novels written by a Utah author. Talk about awesome!!!

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Hazel's Birth Story

I did what I came here to do: Be Becky's doula!!! Hazel is here at last and pretty as ever! Without a doubt this birth challenged me in ways that I cannot fully explain. I am so impressed with Becky, Johnny, Lanna, Hazel and the hospital staff.

After watching and supporting the documentary The Business of Being Born, I have reservations about hospitals and their agenda. I typically go into a hospital with my walls up and ready to fight if given the signal. My formed belief is that hospitals are a great place to have surgery and be sick, but not an ideal place to welcome a new and precious life. After helping with this birth, I have formed new ideas about hospitals and taken some of my walls down, but not all of them. I still believe that childbirth is a natural process and people should educate themselves before choosing interventions.

On Tuesday night I sat in the hospital waiting room with tears in my eyes because my plane was leaving the next day and Hazel hadn't come. Becky was laboring all of Monday night, on and off throughout the day, and very strongly that night.  I had the feeling she wasn't as dilated as we had hoped. If that were the case, we were prepared to sign a waiver to go home and labor there. As suspected, Becky was only at a three and we were going home to continue to labor. In the car ride home, we established that I wasn't going to get on any planes tomorrow. That relieved a lot of anxiety. 

That night (Tuesday) was extra intense. I felt like Becky was really starting to open. Labor slowed during the day on Wednesday, but not as much as it had on Tuesday. Come nightfall, surges were very strong and uncomfortable. We went to the hospital Wednesday night and were admitted. 

To give a brief background, Becky and Johnny took Hypno-birthing classes and were planning on approaching childbirth with those ideals and practices. Hypno-birthing challenges the idea that childbirth is a painful traumatic experience. It teaches people to release the fear associated with childbirth and allow the body to open easily and comfortably. This method is actually very scientifically and anatomically factual. Fear creates tension in the muscles, thus shortening and tightening the muscles. Breath, visualization, affirmations, and hypnosis are used during childbirth to relax the mind and muscles and create a comfortable birth.

Imagine if you will, Becky, Johnny and I working together to ease Becky thru a surge. At the start of a surge, Becky starts breathing deeply, then Johnny or myself begin repeating affirmations and painting a visual image for Becky. Also, Johnny and I were doing counter-pressure on her hips and massage. What a dream team! These techniques kept Becky laboring on her own for the first 50 hours of labor. 

After we were admitted, there was no rush to get a vaginal examination or pressure from the staff. Instead, they wanted to know Becky and Johnny's birth plans. They were incredibly supportive. In fact, we were left to ourselves most of the time with the exception of intermittent monitoring and vitals. We called the shots, just as it should be. After all, people who have babies at a hospital are hiring the hospital. 

There was steady progression until there wasn't. Becky was stuck at a 7 centimeters for over 10 hours and still contracting regularly. The staff was great to inform us of our options. Each time we opted for no interventions, until we didn't. We decided to give Pitocin a try. Once she was on 'the pit', surges were impossible. Keep in mind that this is the third night for all of us without sleep. There was no improvement on pitocin, so we agreed to an internal monitor that measured the strength of each contraction- that way they could know if we needed to up the dosage of Pitocin. When they concluded that the dosage needed to be increased, we opted for an epidural. 

After this procedure, I had a mini melt down. I was in tears because I was relieved, because I couldn't handle seeing Becky in anymore pain, because I was exhausted, and because I didn't know if we (including baby) were all going to make it out alive.

There were a few complications with the epidural, like it was only numbing the right side and she could still feel surges. Rather than re-doing the whole procedure, we made a few alterations. In what seemed like no time at all, we were ready to push. Pushing lasted for 7 hours. We could not seem to get Hazel out. Choices were slim after 80 hours of labor and no strength left. We chose vaginal delivery with the help of forceps. This is where I had another mini melt down. More mini than the first, because it was all happening so fast. After a few really hard tugs Hazel was ripped out of Becky and placed onto her chest. If you are confused about the length of labor, don't be! You are estimating correctly, Becky was in labor for about 85 hours. 

There were several miracles that took place throughout this experience: We had fun, we had enough energy to continue to support each other, Marianne was updating everyone which led to everyone praying on our behalf, Hazel's heart rate stayed constant, Becky had a vaginal delivery, the staff was supportive and encouraging, baby and mamma are healthy, despite any physical trauma- Becky is open and eager to re-count what happened and does so with joy and satisfaction, we used hypno-birthing techniques and saw results, and we are immensely satisfied with what happened. 

This is what I see in my head: Becky holding up Hazel, Johnny and I holding up Becky, legions of angels holding up Johnny and me. I feel so much love for and empathy for Becky and Johnny. My time here has been invaluable and I wish it were everlasting. Hazel is perfect. She is healthy, precious, and very beautiful. Becky's mom has been here cooking, cleaning, and showering us all with love and support. I am amazed at the outcome and I feel genuinely confident that everything is as it ought to be. I am over-joyed. And like Karen Carpenter says, "We've only just begun."

Sunday, May 23, 2010

Wild West

I am enjoying Texas more than I thought I would. My gracious hosts are showing me a good time. We laugh, eat, and wait a lot. We also go on walks, grocery shop, play games, and watch t.v. Isn't it funny how doing the most basic things can be so fun depending on who you are doing them with? I am having a blast being here. I thought I would share some of the not so basic things that I have done in the wild west:

- I got to dance in a rainstorm. The rain here is incredible!
- Ate authentic tex-mex and bbq
-We went to the San Antonio temple. It is closed for cleaning so we didn't go on the grounds.
-The Alamo and the river walk
-I saw both Iron Man and Iron Man dos
-Visited Military bases
-Dr. Captain Foster checked my hearing. I am in the normal range. Phew.
-We spend time at the single's branch. I love seeing Becky and Johnny in their callings and interacting with their friends.

I am going to be so sad to leave here. I have had such a wonderful vacation.

Wednesday, May 12, 2010

sitting, waiting, wishing, philosophizing

Here I am in Tex.As. I am here to be a birthing doula for Becky and Johnny. We are waiting for baby Foster girl to come.   I have never lived with a woman waiting to have a baby before now. As a birthing doula, (and keep in mind I am new to all of this) I check in every other day or so and then continue on my little way.  It is quite different when this anxiousness is a constant. We aren't desperate, at least I don't feel like we are. We have researched a few ways to induce labor naturally. We've also tried a few methods:  Walking, massage, spicy food, and essential oils. This whole sitting, waiting, wishing cycle has got me thinking about life in general. Sometimes it is good to wait. Sometimes there is more than one participating factor or person involved in your life experiences.

I want to talk more about these 'sometimes': Waiting is a tiresome act. It is a conscious effort to keep spirits high when waiting. When waiting turns into worry, the mind tends to tip toward negativity. In the scenario of childbirth, it seems counterproductive to fret for a few reasons. First and foremost, the inevitable, the baby will come out of you eventually- maybe not vaginally but eventually. Also, when the mind is relaxed the body will relax. When the body is relaxed, it will open up. Furthermore, any emotions you create, your baby is experiences them.

However, this all easier said than done. We live in a now society. Modern society created due dates. And if you haven't had your baby by its due date, take the baby out.  Which foreshadows my next 'sometime', we aren't the only participants in our childbirth timing. Believe it or not, the baby is an active participant. Babies intuitively know what to do. They get into the correct position, release the right hormone, and prepare to shimmy on down the birth canal. Not only that, but the whole universe is an active participant in your life, childbirth included. 

Science and birth rates have proven that more babies are born on the full moon than any other time of the month. Also, the lowest percentages of births happen around the new moon. These charts have been calculated for hundreds of years, from all over the world, and are all showing the same results. Coincidence, no! Like I said, believe it or not. I am not here to tell any 10 month pregnant woman not to get induced and not to get crazy anxious. I am here to say sometimes.

Sometimes it is best to wait. Sometimes it is best accept, acknowledge, and embrace your part. Sometimes does not mean a lot or a little- it has no measurement. Sometimes is not God's decision because sometimes is a congregation of factors, free will, and universal laws. This isn't a post about opinions, it is an observation about sometimes. Sometimes, a lot of things.....

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

a ray of sunshine

Wednesday was a beautiful day to have a baby! It may have been overcast and cold, but at 5:30 p.m. a 9 lb 1 ounce ray of sunshine was welcomed into the world.

Wednesday was the full moon and I was sort of anticipating the birth with that in mind. I love/hate the anticipation before a birth. For days or even weeks, I set my phone on volume high and tell myself to not go into a deep sleep because I don't want to miss any calls during the night.

I didn't miss this call. Marianne called me in the middle of the day. She had gone in for a check-up because the night before she was up with contractions. Gratefully, she was dilated to a seven, progressing, and staying to have her baby. I got to the hospital around 3:40.

We were all so happy to be there. The atmosphere was very laid back. Contractions were coming regularly and strong, but not disabling.  Marianne was in and out of the tub. Within a short time, things were intensifying. The contractions were getting very uncomfortable. Marianne moved to the bed because water births aren't allowed at that hospital.  After blood, sweat, tears, laughter, position changes, and 30 minutes of pushing baby Violet was here!

Immediately we all knew Violet's sweet disposition. She is calm and good natured.  She is absolutely  darling with lots of brown hair, big lips, and wrinkle line above her nose. Totally irresistible!!

I remember during transition looking at Marianne. I felt so helpless for her- I knew that no comfort measures could help her at this point. She was in great distress and discomfort. Then all of the sudden time stopped long enough for Marianne to compose herself.  It was as if someone came in the room and wiped the agony away. Her breathe slowed and her face changed. The world started spinning again and the next push Violet was here.

Childbirth is totally amazing. Every birth is different and yet the same feelings of reverence, admiration, and humility flood through me. I envision a gathering of angels present at every birth. They all get the invite and bless the new baby. They've come to celebrate family. I am happy to share in this celebratory  experience. That is one of the many reasons that I am a doula.

Monday, April 26, 2010


Below are pictures from Saturday night with Heather.

                                           Below are some pics from Sunday:
                                           A). Ella the monster
                                           B). Jax and Bria's b-day card creations. So cute!
                                           C). Georgia had 5 kitties on my b-day
                                           D.) Chocolate cheesecake. Yum!

Sunday, April 25, 2010

Happy Birthday to me!!!

Somewhere in my subconscious, I get anxiety and stress around my birthday. It's like I wake up and realize that I am out of sorts and then say to myself, "Oh yeah, my birthday is coming up." Not this year! I have been totally embracing life and age! I have been celebrating all week!

I credit some of this year's ease to Carol Tuttle's book, It's Just My Nature. It's a book about remembering who you are and to stop conforming to other's (or yourself's) perfect person image. I know that I am carefree and playful, but also passionate and serious about things that matter to me. My lifestyle and habits are not in alignment with the world's. I don't have a 9-5 job. I don't care about time. I will play everyday and do things that I enjoy. I think with my heart. I am last minute about almost everything. Previous to reading It's Just My Nature, I felt irresponsible and childish, but now I am embracing those qualities. I am who I am. I contribute to the world in my own way. Most importantly, I am happy with myself. After 25 years of living, I am accepting myself.

My birthday celebrations this week have been off the chizain:

I went to a palm reader! It was awesome! I recommend it to anyone. The lines on your palm are changing daily giving you signs about you! I went to Chrissa at the Golden Braid Bookstore. That day was fun-packed because I hung out with James, Melissa and her family. After palm reading, we went the top of SLC library to overlook the valley and see the roof gardens.

I received not one, but two massages during the week.

I went on a Deseret Industry and Savers shopping spree. I bought a new spring wardrobe. Second hand shopping is so fulfilling because its like I went to hundreds of stores instead of just two. Also, I am a participant in the reduce, reuse, recycle system.

I went caramel. My hair is now a soft shade of caramel. Thank you to my beautiful hair dresser whose skills are tremedous. We also partied hard 'Ape & Stace' style by watching a BBC romance and eating a lot of delicious food.

On my actual birthday, I went to work. In the words of Jim Gaffigan, "Oh, I have to work on my birthday, argh, I have to pay for sex on my birthday." LOL. I actually like to go to work so that was pretty fun. After work, Heather took me out for a night on the town!! I always get spoiled by her :) Thank you, sis! We ate at Pizzeria 712. Yummy! Then we shopped, Red Mangoed it, and went to The Back-up Plan. I give it 1 1/2 stars out of four stars. It was funny.

On Sunday, I had a little family birthday dinner. Chocolate cheesecake, YES PLEASE :)

Thank you to everyone for remembering me on my birthday and making my day special.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

In a loving way...

Doesn't Mr. Schuester look like a frog?

Specifically, the frog from the hit movie, The Frog Princess?

Wednesday, March 31, 2010

Discount for all of April

April is my favorite month! In honor of Spring and renewal, I am sending everyone a coupon for $12 off any service. This coupon is only redeemable in April. Spring is the perfect time cleanse the body, relax, and renew!

If you want to "spring clean" your body, I recommend the Raindrop Technique. It's detox that will leave you feeling great for weeks!

I am also excited to announce that I am a birth doula. I help, support, and serve pregnant women. If you or someone you know is pregnant and wants a doula, refer them my way. Anyone who hires me or refers someone that hires me as a doula will receive a free massage!

My office is in Everybody Wellcome in Orem (right on State street). You can call or email to schedule you appt. I look forward to seeing you this month.

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

What if you slept,

and what if in your sleep you dreamed,

and what if in your dreams

you went to heaven

and there you plucked a strange and beautiful flower,

and what if when you awoke,

you had the flower in your hand?

Ah, what then?

                                      ~Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Monday, March 22, 2010

Health Reform

I went on Twitter and Facebook to read all of the upset about the health care reform. Political opinions aside, I see a silver lining: Maybe Americans will start paying attention and taking responsibility for their health! I am not talking about researching over-the-counter meds the next time your child has a runny nose and staying up-to-date on vaccines. I am referring to core lifestyle changes. How about we start feeding our families whole foods rather than mac and cheese? How about the next time you have a headache reaching for a glass of water instead of a tylenol and coke? How about getting massages, doing cleanses, walking more, listening to your body when it is tired or sick? 

I hear the same excuses:
-It's cheaper to eat processed foods.
-I don't know any other options rather than over-the-counter meds.
-It doesn't really make that big of difference.
-I am going to die one day anyway.

Heres what I think:

-I think spending more on groceries every week is worth increased brain and body functions. Its also cheaper than sick families and doctor visits.
-It IS scary but also really liberating learning about new products and new ways of dealing with illness. Inform yourself! There are many classes offered through health food stores, health clinics, private practices, and members of your community. I would love to teach more classes about Young Living products and Gorgeously Green-ing your homes.
-It does make a difference to eat healthy and be proactive with your health. I know people who have cured cancer on green diets and not one treatment of radiation.
-For those who think that unhealthy habits won't haunt them after physical death, don't understand anything about anything.

In conclusion, I want Americans to reform their health. Everyone (Especially me) needs improvement. We can rely on each other for help and support. Let's bring back community! I can't think of a more worthwhile cause than helping each other be healthy.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Beautiful Desert

When I think of Arizona, I think of boring terrain. Granted, I haven't been everywhere in AZ, but I just roadtriped through a lot of the state and was very visually stimulated. First of all, Arizona license plates are colorful for a reason. I saw so many beautiful colors in the desert. The saguaros cacti are enormous. Arizona is the only place in the world where the saguaros grow. It is also a very mountainous state--not flat. Between the mountains, cactus, flowers, and red rock, I was in heaven.

In Sedona, I hiked a one of seven vortexes. I really enjoyed that experience. Overall, Sedona is amazing. I have heard that it is the prettiest city in the US. I could believe that.

Jerome is another beautiful city. Former mining city, turned ghost town, and now its an artsy touristy city. Maynard James Keenan, lead singer of Tool resides in Jerome and runs an art gallery. So, you can imagine how cool it is...

What I enjoyed most was spending time with my brother and his family. I went to Arizona to drive my brother's car for him. They needed an extra driver and I wanted a getaway. They moved to the Verde valley- which is right in the middle of Sedona and Jerome.

We all miss them terribly! My brother is awesome and a great friend.

My brother has total faith and trust that the universe will provide and it does! (I get scared and anxious). He moved his family to Arizona because its beautiful. He had no job or place to live before he went down there. Not surprisingly, it all worked out. I hope to have that kind of faith in the universe one day!

Thanks for the awesome road trip, beautiful adventure, and lesson learned!

Note: I did not take these pictures.

Monday, February 8, 2010

V-day Conclusions

Valentine's Day is coming and I've been thinking.... the holiday has become disgustingly commercialized. Also, I've been single every Valentine's Day of my life. With that said, I should join the 'Single Awareness Day' folks. Something inside of me enjoys Valentine's Day though. I gleefully celebrate it every year by watching rom-coms, eating chocolate, smelling roses, and wearing red or pink underwear.

Thinking about things I like about about V-day, got me thinking about Cupid ... Who is Cupid? He is the son of Venus (Goddess of love) and Mercury (messenger God). How sweet, a child who spreads love messages. However, un-sweet is the whole history of Cupid and his love arrows. Roman mythology is whacked.

Researching Cupid got me thinking.... In my astrology profile, I am ruled by Venus. Somewhere in the universe, Cupid and I are linked.

Conclusions: Although I disagree with holidays losing their true meaning because of commercialism, I am a love child ruled by Venus. Therefore, I insist on celebrating love holidays.

Other conclusions: Dear John had some sexy Channing Tatum moments and I like celebrating by watching rom-dramas too. Happy Valentine's Day!!!!

Saturday, January 30, 2010

A Beautiful Birth

It's almost been a week since I attended a beautiful birth. Unbelievable how fast time flies. I was in attendance as a doula & friend. Esther delivered at Birthing Your Way in Orem. I had never attended a birth outside of a hospital setting before. It was totally incredible! The center was so safe, relaxed, and home-like. I felt very fortunate to share the experience with such a knowledgeable, strong, and diverse team. There were two midwives, one midwife assistant, one student midwife, and me. Not to mention Esther and her mother are both nurses and Keyvan is really informed about natural childbirth.

I find it hard to express with words how miraculous it is to welcome a new baby into the world. Angels are dancing and singing, tears and laughter are flowing, and God is smiling.

Esther labored at home for many hours before going to the birthing center. She labored for another 8-9 hours at the b.c. It was nice to not only have the options, but be encouraged to eat, bathe, drink, walk, listen to music, change positions when pushing, and be vocal.

Baby girl cuteness came at 4:21 p.m. after an 1 1/2 hours of pushing. She was put on Esther's chest and peacefully gazed up at her mama. When dad said something her head and eyes immediately turned to him. She was alert, calm, and serene. She has a full head of black hair, black eyelashes, gorgeous skin, and the prettiest little face. She wanted to eat almost immediately and she did!

It must have been an hour or more before she was weighed (6 lbs 14 oz) and measured (19in & 3/8s) and assessed. Both mom and baby are happy and healthy.

I know there is a lot of fear and misinformation about birthing outside of a hospital. Is it safe? Can I transfer to a hospital if I needed to? Are midwives informed? Will my baby survive? Yes, yes, yes, and yes. As a doula, a woman, and a witness, I speak honestly that it is safe and normal. If you or baby have health problems, maybe the hospital is the best place for you to deliver. Either way, consider your options. Talk to people who have birthed outside and inside hospitals, with midwives and with ob-gyns, naturally and medicated. There is no right or wrong way to bring your baby into the world. Choose to be informed!!

Working as a doula is amazing. I support everyone and every scenario. Doulas help mamas make informed decisions. My wish is for every laboring woman to have a doula. Women are really good at supporting, informing, and comforting women. Every doula I know works with budgets. If you have any questions or curiosities, get answers! You won't regret being informed, it's empowering!

Saturday, January 23, 2010

A big thank you to those of you who read my blog and to Heather for making my headers.

The other day I was teaching esthetics students about the basics of essential oils and massage. We also talked a lot about quality products that are good for the skin. I gave them a list of harmful chemicals that are common in cosmetics and other body products. Here is the list in case you are interested:
We talked a lot about chemicals and skin sensitivity. There is an increase of people with allergies, thus bringing awareness to the ingredients in everyday products. Further emphasising the importance of knowing what synthetic ingredients are doing to your skin and organs.

Therapeutic grade essential oils (that contain no additives or dilutions and have been distilled at low temps and low pressure) are great for the skin. The molecules are small enough to be absorbed into the skin and they don't compromise the skin's acid mantle. This is boring info, but significantly important esp. when purchasing and using essential oils.

One of the students who was pregnant asked if the oils were safe to use during pregnancy. I told her ABSOLUTELY. The only ones that aren't are Oregano, Thyme, Clary Sage and sometimes Fennel and I gave her specific explanations. Then I said, The more important question is, 'Is my shampoo, lotion, laundry detergent, toilet cleaner etc. safe to use?'

People, please consider the safety of your everyday household cleaners, cosmetics, and skin products. Some, no MOST, of these products are really hazardous to you, your children, and pets. You don't have to compromise cleanliness, smell goods, or price to use safe products. And I mean it when I say price. In fact, most would save money if they used safe cleaning products.

Research this for yourself. Don't trust me. Learn about the products your family is using. It matters. Your health shouldn't be compromised for a smelly hand soap or a cheap lotion.