10 most embarrassing massage questions

I found these questions and decided to answer them myself:
(http://inner-harmony.gaia.com/blog/2009/2/10_embarrassing_massage_questionsand )

1. Do I have to take off my underwear?

YES (just kidding). Your comfort is the most important thing. But honestly it makes it a little easier sometimes with garments.

2. Do I tip the therapist?

YES Leave a tip. Even if your strapped for cash. Utah is known for being terrible tippers. Law of karma- it will come back to you

3. What happens if I sleep and drool or snor?

Its totally okay. Sometimes its nice when people sleep:)

4. Will the massage therapist be in the room when I take off my clothes?

NO you are in the room alone. Once I asked someone if they were ready for me to come into the room and they said 'uh huh', but he/she actually said 'nu uh' and I saw some nakedness. Lesson: be clear or you might have a similar experience

5. What if I get an erection?

It does happen. Believe me it is uncomfortable for both parties. I would like to think it is controllable, but I have been told otherwise. So, basically what really happens is we both ignore the elephant in the room.

6. If the massage is too soft or too hard should I speak up?

YES speak up! I am not a mind reader

7. If I am self conscience about an area can I tell the therapist not to massage there?

YES most people are embarrassed. We are a society that is so afraid and uncomfortable with our bodies: blemishes, fat, hair, scars, etc.. I have seen it all and you don't need to be embarrassed, but speak up if you don't want to be touched somewhere.

8. What if I fart?

Once again, it happens. It is really embarrassing. Side note- I had a client that couldn't hear and I used fart all the time while massaging him/her. So sometimes your therapist does it too.

9. Do I talk to the therapist or stay silent?

It doesn't matter. Usually excessive chatting is a sign of nervousness. My rule is that I will chat back, but I don't encourage chatting because this is your time.

10. How do I know if my therapist is legitimate?

Most therapists have his/her license displayed in the office somewhere. If not, you can request the license number ahead of time- its public info at dopl.gov

Does anyone have any embarrassing questions that weren't covered?

Extreme Sale

I am selling massage gift certificates for the next two weeks. What brought on this EXTREME sale?: I quit my day job, I am moving this month, car registration is due this month, and I want to attend a doula workshop so I can certify. If you like getting massages, giving massages as gifts, or can't say no to a good deal this is your day (well actually two weeks)

Massages:
one hour: $40
3 one hours: $105

Reflexology:
3o mins: $25
3 3o mins: $60

Prices to match any budget!!!


hahaha- thought you'd all like this pic :)

In the Old Testament there was a huge plague killing the population. Moses prayed and here is his answer in EXODUS 30:

22 ¶ Moreover the Lord spake unto Moses, saying,
23 Take thou also unto thee principal spices, of pure myrrh five hundred shekels, and of sweet cinnamon half so much, even two hundred and fifty shekels, and of sweet calamus two hundred and fifty shekels,
24 And of cassia five hundred shekels, after the shekel of the sanctuary, and of aoil olive an hin:
25 And thou shalt make it an oil of holy ointment, an ointment compound after the art of the apothecary: it shall be an holy anointing oil.

The Lord gave Moses an essential oil recipe to protect him and his family and they survived.



Another example, the black plague (Bubonic virus) that killed 2/3 of Europe. There were a group of thieves who dug up bodies or found dead bodies and stole all of their valuables. When the King finally captured these rumored 'mystics' he discovered they were spice merchants. They were able to rob the dead bodies without catching the plague because they doused themselves with several spices and herbs. Google 'Vinegar of the four thieves' for the full historical record and recipe.




THESE TWO ANCIENT RECIPES ARE AVAILABLE AT YOUNG LIVING AND I CAN GET THEM FOR YOU. THEY ARE CALLED EXODUS AND THIEVES. PROTECT YOURSELF AND YOUR FAMILY FROM VIRUSES, BACTERIAS, AND FUNGI.

CHALLENGE: NAME TWO MODERN DAY DRUGS THAT CARRY ANTI-VIRAL, ANTI-BACTERIAL, ANTI-FUNGAL PROPERTIES, CAN BE USED BY BOTH INFANT AND ELDERLY, DON'T HAVE SIDE EFFECTS, AND AREN'T POISONOUS.

I realize that modern day epidemics are in fact dangerous. I also know that God knew what plagues were going to be and created herbs and spices to combat them. For me, its a matter of trusting God and his creations. I don't stress and I don't believe there is any disease, plague, or epidemic that God can't cure.